Boys. AM I RIGHT?

Bill'm Bayne is a person I speak of a lot. Maybe not audibly though, it's hard to tell these days. He is a [super] talented and creative internet personality, whose content has moved and inspired me to no end. 

#CCC15! 
[sorry thats an inside joke between me and my friend Jesi Rae.] 

After consuming every piece of content he has produced and appeared in on the internet, the only thing left for this millennial to do is kiss those deliciously full pouty lips of his to stop him from saying sad things. one day. 

Also, Team Grey Pants; You know what I'm talking about. 

-We can be happy together Washington James, we really can. -
For about 6 months anyway. 

All of this however, is beside the point.

Click these words for a surprise.
The surprise is a link to a website where you can buy this poster.
Guys, buy it so he will love me. = 'Will love me.'
I'll see myself out.

Haynes, in the world of Rae, is a notoriously depressed Comedic Demi God, which duh hello. do you see the connection? [Hint: I too am a depressed person. I am not funny though].

He often accounts his depressive disposition to his lack of [lady hugging-pie in bed eating- binge anime cuddling-real and pure conversing-balls deep] penetration. 
not solely, but a large portion.

and at first I thought he was just being an ungrateful and entitled little prick.

I mean, I don't know him but he is handsome, talented, and has garnered some 'success' for himself. all at a relatively young age. I mean, we all have our demons but Come the [FL]uck on!

like, dude. C'mon.

seriously? 

like, dude.

for real?

like, C'mon!

Dude.

Seriously.

im not even kidding,

Negrito;)

Dude.

Kid.

My Ni......

*then I had a stroke*

Turns out, of course, he is/was onto something.
[Thus my perception of him changed.]

I've been thinking about happiness a lot. 
Not exclusively my happiness but happiness in general.

Is it real? is it just an idea? is it at its very core social and mental conditioning? 

Is there any form of happy that is pure, and untethered?

*then I had another stroke because, damn existentialism, can we just like LIVE tho?*

I think the answer is Yes!
I think there is a happiness that is pure and untethered.

I think that's what [Love] is.

And while platonic love is full of value and reward, and self love is of the utmost importance there is something to be said about romantic love. the kind that fully encompasses camaraderie, companionship and the purest tactile connection. again, that is not to say other forms of love are not important but maybe it's like a pie, a cherry pie, a freshly baked not yet sliced cherry pie, made in a pie pan.

The love for yourself.
The love of your platonic person[s].
The love of the friend that touches your genitals while sharing your interests and simultaneously edifying and affirming your purpose. [That's how sex works, right?]

Maybe that's all that matters in this life.
maybe that is the only force that can permeate the layers & layers of darkness within and around us.
- Complete, Full circle, Tangible Love. -

Maybe, that is why, without it we feel hopelessly broken.

kookookachoo.

Namsate.